Venus and Jupiter Dancing

by Paul Chubbuck

Tonight Venus and Jupiter are close-dancing, high in the deep blue West.
You seem to me as far away as they, which hurts my heart,
though the cherished words of my Teacher say you are as close as my next breath.
“Much closer than that”, she once said to me.

How can this be then, that my heart is so filled with loneliness?
I know now that it has always been you I longed for.
When I cried for Mother, it was your milk I hungered after.
When I courted sweet lovers, my lips ached for your kisses.
When I laughed gut-deep with brothers and sisters, it was your wordless joke I got.
When I finally fell silent, prostrate,
it was you I saw, behind things and under words.

Yet still, I am lonely. Longing.
How can this be?
How do I miss the mark, keeping your heart from mine?
Please show me, that I may correct my sin,
for I wish tonight to dance with Venus and Jupiter
and I have no patience left for reasons I cannot.

Paul Chubbuck is a practicing psychotherapist in Fort Collins, CO, using Somatic Experiencing® to help people release trauma, abuse, and loss. He may be reached at 970-493-2958 or through his website at www.releasingthepast.com.

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