by Paul Chubbuck

You know the feeling.
You’ve been searching for a long time
for the ones you belong with,
who will recognize and welcome you home.

You know what it’s like to be the ugly duckling.
“Who are these waddlers I’ve been thrown in with?
What pond did they come from?”
There’s the one who mistrusts you,
another that makes you cringe,
one who excites your sexual longing,
who you dream could complete your life,
some you admire, some who irritate,
several who seem smarter and faster,
and a couple you’re sure are dumber.

There’s even one who knows who you are
when you won’t yet admit you do.

This ragtag bunch doesn’t look like the
the family you’ve been searching for.
You never doubted you’d recognize the right ones instantly,
comforting as angels and radiant with love.

But you’re blinded by ignorance.
Like the lion cub in the story, raised with sheep,
you think you know who you are,
but you’ve never learned to roar.

These ones you’re with now will drive you crazy
pulling you this way and that,
And when you get really tired of crazy,
you’ll roar,
and realize you’re home.

These ones you’re with now…
they’re exactly the right ones.

God loves disguises.

Paul Chubbuck is a practicing psychotherapist in Fort Collins, CO, using Somatic Experiencing® to help people release trauma, abuse, and loss. He may be reached at 970-493-2958 or through his website at

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