Testimonials

Healing experiences with Releasing the Past

Paul, Thank you for your willingness to work with me and for not giving up on me even during my most frustrating and difficult times. It means a lot to me that you are willing to hear me out and try to understand my needs– this hasn’t been easy for me at all. But I just want to thank you for listening to me and not judging me and giving me support. Support that i never got from my own family.

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Thank you, Paul. I appreciate your kind and loving care. I think loving and accepting myself is where it’s at. After our appointment, the fog lifted. I was able to connect with my daughter and stay strong and to not fall into arguments with my husband. I feel that this journey I’m about to embark on is going to call for a lot of strength and loving kindness towards myself. Thank you for showing that to me.

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“In one of my Somatic therapy sessions with Paul, I had a memory of being left at a juvenile detention center and then transferred to a foster home as a teenager. I didn’t know this was traumatic for me until I shared how I felt so alone, afraid and unwanted and had a frozen type of reaction in my body as I told the story. Much to my surprise, I had very little compassion for that part of myself and had seemingly rejected that unwanted teenage girl. Paul guided me through this experience and taught me to accept and love that teenage part of me that I had rejected decades ago. With Paul’s gentle and compassionate guidance, I learned the importance of self- love during that session.

It was shortly afterwards that I had to confront a “bully” in my family and did so without hesitation or anxiety. I had acquired the confidence to be assertive and stand up for myself with little regard as to how I might be perceived. It was as if someone else was speaking for me. I had regained something I had lost in my youth…..the courage to be myself. I am very grateful for my work with Paul. He is a genuinely kind and gifted healer.”

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“Your work with me over the years has been rich and meaningful, and I feel like you’ve helped me to forge a very solid connection with you. I appreciate your compassion and your solidity.”

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“Just a little note to let you know that my boyfriend proposed to me on Friday evening, on a beautiful beach and that I said yes! We are so happy, committed and open, I’m over the moon as this is the love I always dreamed of having but never felt truly possible for me. I can’t stop smiling!  We are doing great and the communication, honesty, openness, and love grows every day. What a joy! Thank you for ALL you have opened up for me and helped me through.”

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“Thank you Paul, for being such a great counsellor; for sharing all these techniques I can do outside of sessions to become independent of a therapist, for seeing me as a whole being. For being so authentic and warm and open: as I said to my friend after our first trial session: wauw, that was weird, a therapist sharing his emotions, feeling into my jaws sad story. That was so powerful, I felt acknowledged in my trauma, I could see you leading by example, I want to be able to get rooted and learn to deal with emotions quickly and authentically. No more added trauma please.
But moreover I told him: IF I ever become a therapist, this is how i will do it, and i don’t care if it doesn’t fit our culture, this is the only thing that feels right: for me to stay sane as a therapist and not be stuck in other people’s emotions, showing the client empathy and how to do it. Coz if I can open up and deal with emotions, where I m coming from, everybody has the potential.”

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“I am very grateful to be doing this work. It has helped me find out what my core issue is and work on it and beyond that it is giving me the greatest gift and finding peace and learning to trust again. I have tried CBT a lot and as much as it has given me insight, somatic therapy was able to dig deeper.”

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“I broke a pattern today. I didn’t judge myself for how I was feeling. I didn’t try to change how I was feeling. I absolutely embraced my femininity and I feel so much better for it. Because I’m allowing me to be me. I think I’ve actually been looking for my own acceptance all along. Magical. Thank you Paul. Amazing support from you these past two days. It’s made such a difference.”

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“I’ve seen ‘talk’ therapists and never found the insights to stick for long. When I met Paul, I was skeptical that somatic therapy would make any difference. Oh, how wrong I was! My healing began when I started to feel gratitude for who I am. My past, and the characters I had developed in response, served their purpose. Paul helped me recognize that I was focusing on and hiding from pain and fear instead of giving myself love, health and happiness. His guidance helped me discover my strength to stop my 19 year nicotine addiction, add more compassion to my marriage, and start a path of self-discovery and growth. I definitely recommend Paul to anyone who has been lost in the shadows and wants to take control of their life!”

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“Paul is a wonderful, compassionate source of support and inspiration. He has a broad spectrum of therapy tools from which to draw on and moves easily between ports of intellect, emotion, spirituality, physicality and imagination. Using a keen intuition, a deep sense of empathy and a lovely sense of humour, Paul guides me through issues ranging from joy to profound sorrow with humility and reverence. A highly recommended and skilled therapist.”

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“I had been trying to deal with PTSD for 15 years, I was exhausted and a little hopeless (after a year of talk therapy that helped me in other areas, but not with my nightmares). The first session that we had was amazing, now after 5 months of healing work, I barely remember my last nightmare. I feel empowered and ready to deal with daily situations that used to be a huge struggle for me and stopped me from pursuing my goals. I am a better spouse and parent, and I recommend Paul Chubbuck to anybody struggling with a trauma.”

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“Through our work, I’m feeling stronger at the very core of myself, I think I am actually ready to let go of these traumatic experiences. Before, I don’t think I could have fully let go of them because being traumatized was so deeply connected to my self-definition. Now that I know that I’m NOT a broken traumatized person, but a whole and complete person who was traumatized, I don’t need to hang on to the trauma experiences in my body. Even the ones that happened at birth. Whew. This is huge. I have a few tears happening as I’m writing. Trauma is actually a thing that is separate from me.”

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“I suddenly realised that my inner child is not just the wounded one, she doesn’t just carry the trauma. She carries the rich imagination and creativity too – the side of me that had to be pushed aside so I could survive. She’s my inner artist, she communicates in stunning ways what my left brain could never communicate in a million words. She is my soul and I welcome her home with love and appreciation, not just for her carrying the pain for me, but for who she truly is. She’s the me I had to trash to fit into the scaled down version of me that could survive. This journey is not just about healing the wounds, it’s about embracing all of me. You knew that, but I didn’t. God this is huge. I have so much appreciation for you holding that space for her Paul, while I wanted to stay ‘safe’ in my intellect. With tears in my eyes and appreciation in my heart.”

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“I really appreciate you thinking of me, and giving me support and guidance in this way. I know that you are totally right, that if I work on truly loving myself the issues that I have with other things will sort themselves out. Next time I feel like watching the sun go down I’ll take the small child inside of me into account and go and sit by the Thames. I actually tried ‘free-form’ dancing this morning, I put some really good music on and once I had got my ego – who was telling me what a plonker I looked – out of the way, I actually really enjoyed it and I felt quite tearful but in a good way.”

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“I realised that now that I actually like myself, I can truly start being single, instead of just being ‘without a man’. I had the impulse that since I felt so good, I should start dating again, and then suddenly realised that no, I shouldn’t. I might perhaps consider spending the next 6 months single by choice in order to get to know myself from a place of liking, rather than one of loathing.”

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“I’m having an exciting breakthrough day! Last night, I ate nuts again (and I’m allergic), but no anaphalaxis! I took heavy duty anti-histamines and waited, but although I felt quite ill physically and today am puffy and uncomfortable, I didn’t have a full-blown reaction. AND, I didn’t panic! Last time, I was so much in fear mode that I was panicking the whole night and the next day. I didn’t panic! I stayed present with my body and allowed myself to be uncomfortable, but if my body didn’t say ‘death’ then I didn’t think ‘death’. I’m so happy about this! Today, I don’t feel great, but my mood and mental state is something I feel in charge of! I bought myself tulips today to celebrate!”

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“You might say that I did the work and you can’t take credit, but it is very rare for someone to journey to an unknown destination without some guidance. You helped reveal hidden pieces of myself and shared wisdom that calmed the layers of my psyche. You shifted the fulcrum so that I could balance once more. I am a better person today because of you and I truly appreciate what you did. Thank you for being you!”

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“I was desperate, shattered, scared and hopeless. Working with Paul gave me the freedom to really ‘Release my Past’ and move forward in my life. I found serenity just hearing his voice. I had huge trust in him and knew I could tell him anything without judgement. Safety was the key in healing for me and I found that with Paul. Phone session after phone session I began to release the past and find my true authentic self. I learned how to feel, love and open my heart again. I am so grateful for Paul for staying with me on my journey. Finding him was a gift from God.”

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“After reading Peter A. Levine’s book, Waking the Tiger, I knew that Somatic Experiencing was the only therapy that might be effective for me to free myself from my trauma. I searched through all the biographies of Colorado practitioners and chose Paul Chubbuck, even though it would have been easier for me to go to Boulder for this therapy. I was not disappointed.”

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“You sure know how to support your clients, even from the other side of the world, It became clear that you are the first practitioner I’ve worked with who has cut through my intellectual denial. Sometimes we need an angel to lead us to a place that is going to hurt, but will move us forward. Thank you for doing that for me yesterday. Big thank you.”

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“When I first went to Paul, I felt like I was in a deep, dark well with no ladder or help nearby. After only a few sessions, I began feeling relief and progress toward recovery. Now, I not only feel fine but am confident that, should I ever begin feeling bad again, I can recognize it and have the tools to deal with it effectively.”

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“My phone session with Paul quickly focused on a major trauma in my life. I re-experienced the event with a positive outcome. That night I had a dream in which I was attractive, physically powerful, adventurous and confident. I awoke with a smile and scrambled to write down the adventure. It was a wonderful confirmation of a shift deep within.”

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“Until recently, my life’s experience had always been threatened with a sense of rejection and abandonment. With Paul’s guidance and my own reflection, I have found the awareness of who I am internally, the inner-strength I hold, and the ability to express my emotional and physical being with those around me.”

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“Thanks again for all your awesome help toward my healing and growth. The immense fatigue I’d felt for the previous week left me after our appointment yesterday. The work we did at the end of our session helped empower me in many ways. I’m still feeling the powerful eagle flying over all. Thank you.”

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“Thanks Paul. I sang 3 high C’s in rehearsal last night! Big change.”

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“I am feeling really strong after our session last week and gaining ever more insight into the messages my body has for me. This work is really really amazing!”

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“I don’t know how you do it Paul, but you sure do give me the perfect support I need in the moment. Thank you. I’m really touched by how much you care, and the way you continue to be there Paul. It means a heck of a lot in this strange world I find myself living in these days. A heck of a lot.”

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“The Universe really knew what it was doing entrusting me in your care.”

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“Having even a few moments of working through the dynamics of the car accident has given me such a gentle and loving perspective on my body.  I’ve been mentally ‘cradling’ my spine all evening, just like I held my “little girl” the other day, and it feels so nice!”

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“I feel very humble and thankful knowing you hung in there with me through the storm of the last month. Your integrity is what makes you safe, and it never ever waivers, and I am so thankful for that. It was very nice working with you again today.  Thank you, so very very much.”

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“I think if the last nine months of us working together were to be condensed into a chapter in the book of my life, the title of the chapter would be The Power of Compassion.”

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“I’ve had a major breakthrough today in regards to singing and a release in my body.  This is such an amazing feeling!!!”

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“You have done an amazing thing today.  What happened today was really an aha moment.”

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“And it was also a testament to the sense of safety you create with your clients – even over skype!  I’ve had one other therapist try to use that 2 chair technique with me and it was disastrous.  I think at that time I was definitely not feeling safe and my ‘Gatekeeper’ kicked up a huge fuss and the whole session derailed.”

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“I’m a gardener, I sow seeds, I nurture them, and watch them go from tiny seedling into full grown plant.  You are a gardener too.  You sow seeds in my mind, nurture them and then watch them grow.  They just tend to grow faster than the plants I grow!!!”

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“I really got a lot from the phone consultation with you the other day. I found that, in half an hour, I was able to get more benefit from noticing my body and following those sensations with compassion and curiosity than I’ve done in months of talk therapy!”

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“I would like to thank you for the session today, it was deep and powerful.  Even though I feel tired now I feel more reconnected to myself.”

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“Your help was invaluable as always today.  Bless you.  Somehow it’s easier to see all this stuff when you hold a space of acceptance/non-judgement for it all.  Big thanks.”

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“Before I came to Paul for therapy, my life seemed to be controlled by my emotional reaction to every situation that triggered uncomfortable past memories. Now when a situation brings that emotion to the forefront, I am able to feel it and quickly dismiss it.”

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“Paul, I hope this email can convey at least a small portion of my deep gratitude. I’m getting my life back. Overcoming challenges has become much easier. My confidence is building. Using the techniques that you’ve taught me I’m seeing what’s good in my life.”

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“I just wanted to let you know how much better I felt this morning than I expected to — hardly any stiffness or soreness at all. So what you did last night sure worked. I just wanted to let you know how much I appreciate what you did.”

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“I have been down many healing paths to release the trauma of childhood cancer and amputation. Working with Paul got me in touch with a powerful wisdom in my body for healing which I hadn’t previously experienced.”

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“I am feeling so strengthened by our work. It’s very powerful for me.”

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“Thank you for all your help in the past year. I wanted to schedule a ‘tune-up’ and also just kind of sit down and tell you what a hell of a job you’ve done with me.”

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“I would get an anxious feeling in the pit of my stomach regarding issues with my husband. I was very tired of these same old reactions. After one session with Paul I was able to shift, which has allowed me to interact with my husband in a whole new way. Thank you so much.”

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“Wow! I feel better, I actually feel. I never write poetry but one just started coming. I think I’m healing!”

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“You seem to be someone who really cares if they help their clients as opposed to just collecting a paycheck like some therapists I’ve dealt with.”

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“Thanks for the session we had today, it was very insightful and very helpful. I can already feel a peace that I haven’t felt for awhile, which is wonderful!”

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“Paul, I am so glad to be working with you. I have been in the healing and medical profession for over 25 years, and I find true ‘healers’ are rare. True healing comes from a place of deep compassion, caring, and kindness, which I see and experience from you.”

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Thanks so much for your great advice to “stay with myself before taking action”. Wow, this has been an amazing opportunity to heal and to learn more about myself and my wounds. I’d like to share something really profound that came up today.  I went to look over the messages of the exchange with my ex-boyfriend, and every fibre of my being wanted to write to him. It felt SO like the right thing to do. I’d composed the message and everything. Then I stopped. I went to the little water/rock garden in my block of flats, which I find beautiful and peaceful and I sat with what i was feeling. I was feeling hurt, betrayed, abandoned, and impatient. I wanted to get my pride back, as I felt weak and that my pride had been hurt here. In my body I felt a racing heart, churning stomach, teary, tense. I felt like I needed to take control back, to get in a position of control. And this happens a lot in relationships, I want to control the love, the pace of things, the way we move forward. I find myself judging milestones and often feeling we come up short of how things ‘should be’.  So I sat with that need to control – what was underneath it? And then it was clear, and incredibly painful. Sheer, terrifying, naked, open-hearted vulnerability. If I do nothing, but keep my heart open, which is how I want to live, then I feel so vulnerable. I feel like I have no armour, no defence to protect myself, and that is so scary for me. I cried and cried, and shook. And then it passed and I laughed a bit – totally relieved that I hadn’t sent the ‘wrapping up’ message.  I have a clearer idea of what loving boundaries look like from this experience. It is unlikely that I will contact him again without an initiation from him, but I don’t need to set rules around it – those are like setting up barriers around my heart, and I don’t want to cage my heart in that way.  What an incredible gift sitting with the emotion, and allowing it, is. What incredible discovery about how hard I find it to stand – armour off, arms and heart open. Knowing that arrows may hit me, but walking through life without the armour initially, naked, open-hearted and free.

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